Monday morning coffee

 
Picture this scenario: a group of pastors is having coffee together on a Monday morning.  A Baptist minister says, “I woke up Sunday morning and found a note from my wife on the kitchen table.  She has left me and is putting divorce proceedings in motion.  I told my church officials about it and they replied, ‘Divorce, huh?  That’s rough.  We’ll need you out of the parsonage by the end of the week.’ ”  What am I going to do?  No Baptist church in the world will take on a divorced minister.
 
A congregational colleague says, “I feel for you, brother.  My people met me at the door of the church after service yesterday and said that they just didn’t like the cut of my jib.  I don’t know where I’m going to find another congregation.”  How do I go about finding another spot?
 
A third pastor adds, “My Finance Committee told me Sunday evening that times are tough.  They are going to have to cut my salary by a third.  I’m not getting any younger.  How am I going to set anything aside as a next egg on so much less money?”
 
They turn to the fourth member of the group – a United Methodist – and say, “How about you, Brother?  How do you deal with these things?”
 
“Well,” replies the pastor, “I am a United Methodist.  While we don’t encourage divorce, in our church that doesn’t automatically disqualify a person from the ministry.  We also have guaranteed appointments for our fully-credentialed clergy.  If a congregation gets so dissatisfied with us that they demand our removal, we have another place to go.  And, we have a guaranteed minimum salary and fully-funded pensions for our preachers.”
 
There is quiet around the table for a few moments.  Then, simultaneously, the first three ask, “How do you get to BE a Methodist preacher?”
 
I wish I could say that this is fanciful.  But, the roster of United Methodist ministers is chock full of pastors who have come in from other denominations for reasons that have nothing to do with personal theology or the practice of mission and ministry.  They have found what they consider to be a secure spot for the rest of their active careers.  They are still Baptist or Congregational or whatever they used to be.  And, they preach and teach and administer the affairs of the church as if they were in their former communions.  They are (United) Methodist in name only.

And a lot of these wolves in sheep’s clothing have been at the forefront of the recent disaffiliation movement within The United Methodist Church (UMC).  I say this not out of speculation, but as a result of first-hand observation and conversation.  The church hasn’t properly vetted or suitably held these pastors accountable, but have been set them loose on congregations that were vulnerable to the self-serving leadership of these folks.
 
So, we have lost countless congregations, and maybe even multitudes of souls, due to the lack of vigilance on the part of our church.  We have diluted our Wesleyan heritage and our Methodist theology for the sake of administrative convenience.  How many disaffiliating congregations have been led down that path by pastors who did not grow up in the UMC? 
 
We have paid a terrible price for expediency.

The peace of the Lord be with you.